Give them what they want!

It's late. Super late for me this week anyway. I went to go to bed at 9:45 and it's just not happening tonight. You know I have these amazing things planned for me to write to you guys. Revelation that will rock your socks. And I never get to them. I laugh because I got a B on a project my JR year in Governors School because I didn't finish a portion of my project.

We were working on our showcase. We wrote this cluster of dreams and made them into skits. It was called Lucid. My part was to record kids telling me what their dreams were. Then I was going to mesh them together to open the show. I went to Clymore for 2 weeks and worked hard to compile this amazing material that I needed. Just to realize the camera didn't pick up any of the records. I was completely devastated. My final grade was a B "because I didn't finish what I started."

Some phrases you hear in your lifetime replay in your mind over and over. Like the one "Don't ever do anything with music because you will never get anywhere" playing in my head the most. I'm sitting here in my living room almost in tears because I have allowed myself to think these statements for the last 14 years. I decided to quit music before High School and didn't sing until my senior year. Every time I start something, I quickly remember that I never finish what I start.

For so long I have allowed myself to think these things. Tonight as I was sitting here filling out some paperwork I was reminded about these wonderful things I was supposed to write to each of you about the lies that Satan tells us. I literally have been beating myself up for days about it. I shook my head and said, "Oh it's okay Deborah. It's just another thing you won't finish." God reminded me a moment later of something.

The reason people read the blog isn't because I am great with my grammer. Or that I am giving you step by step instructions on how to do something. Or even that I am sitting here telling you that I'm going to write these fantastic blogs about the lies that Satan tells us and how to fight back. NO. It's because I relate my Christian walk with every day. The things around me. Experiences I have. Things I see. Just LIFE!

I'm sorry if I've been a turd head because of that and I'm sorry that I haven't been giving you what you want. So to speak. Anyway. Goodnight. I'm going to try to calm my mind down and get some rest!