The past week there have been little things in my own life that have lead up to today. Honestly, these things started the day I started talking to random scum online. It probably started earlier than that but that doesn't matter one way or another. Yesterday's sermons that I listened to started the ball rolling all over again. I picked up a book that was a text for a class I took in college. Words of Wisdom from Women at the Well by Shannon Ethridge.
If you are a woman who had an absent father or didn't know your father at all. I encourage you to pick this book up and give it a read. If you are a woman who tries to find her identity in a man, I encourage you to pick this book up as well. It covers quenching your heart's thirst for love and intimacy.
The first chapter in the book covers "admitting that you have a problem" stage. Basically it goes over how to find out if you are a woman who tries to find her identity in her relationships. So many times we don't even know that we are that woman who drinks from the shallow well of un-successful relationships instead of waiting for the correct man. You should want a man who is going to say, "I don't care about your past, I only care about your future and I want to be a part of helping you become all that God created you to be." Instead we spend night after night in bed with another man who will never fulfill the REAL hole that you have in your life.
You could be living a secret double life that no one knows about. You could be married and have secret issues that you haven't dealt with. Can I be completely honest and naked? There are areas in my life that I haven't completely surrendered to God. I struggle with my image and identity in Christ. I am still a Woman at the Well. I am reading this book and trying to change myself but I know that it's not going to be an easy road.
"Come just as you are; ask and ye shall receive; your sins will be washed away, etc. etc. etc.," but they didn't tell me that my sins would wash right back up onto the shore if I didn't die to myself everyday." - From the book. I've heard it being said that if you don't tell the Demon that is taunting you to flee it stays there. What they never say is that when you "clean house" he comes back twice as strong with the temptation. You have to DIE DAILY! Not just one time. But every day.
What this has taught me today is that I have placed unrealistic expectations on my husband over the past 5 years. He can't play "God" in my life. That is setting him up to fail. That would cause the fail of our marriage. I cannot bring myself to continue to put him in that position. That's MY issue that I have to deal with to ensure that our marriage doesn't fail. That's what I learned today. I do encourage you to check out this book and give it a look. It may change your life, your relationship with Christ, and just might save your relationship.
No comments:
Post a Comment